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Varanasi is a city of beautiful chaos. Located on the banks of the Ganges River, it’s one of the oldest continuously inhabited cities in the world, and also one of the holiest. The river is the pulse of the city and it’s worth setting your alarm so that you can be on the water for sunrise. Locals descend the ghats (the stairs leading down to the banks of the river) to bathe, pilgrims perform Hindu ceremonies, and women wash their laundry then hang it along the stairs to dry. Even more fascinating are the burning ghats that send plumes of smoke and flames into the air as they cremate the bodies of the dead. Anyone visiting Varanasi must read Geoff Dyer’s book “Jeff in Venice, Death in Varanasi.” It perfectly captures the spirit of the city.

The holy Ganges River is holiest in Varanasi. And therefore, taking a dip in the river is a spiritual experience. It might be spiritually pure, but it’s not ecologically pure, by any means. The city of Varanasi alone deposits 200 million liters of untreated human sewage per day. Then there are the ashes from the 30,000 cremations that take place on the river annually. It’s like a cocktail for various water-born illnesses. Or spiritual enlightenment. Take your pick.

Meet Bengali Ma. She’s an aghori, part of a rare sect of Hinduism that has a reputation for very bizarre practices. In their belief system, everything is the same, which means they might eat meat but aren’t bothered if the meat came from an animal or....a human. They might have sex but it doesn’t matter if the person is alive or dead. They (fortunately) practice away from society and speaking to outsiders is very rare. When I was in Varanasi recently, a professor friend who studies the aghori took me out of the city for a very rare meeting with Bengali Ma, one of the few female aghori. The first question I wanted to ask was about the unusual way aghori are said to practice. Was it true? Bengali Ma was vague. She said she doesn’t do these things. But, she told me, when you’re in training, which consists of hanging around cremation grounds for about 10 years and doing ample amounts of mediation, you have to do a lot of strange stuff. “To get to the light,” she said, “you have to go through the darkness first.”

While Kumbh Mela occurs every 3 years in 4 different Indian locations, the Maha Mela is every 12 years near Allahabad, just over 100 kilometers from Varanasi. We hired a driver with the intent of visiting two temples along the way and used the Ganges as our guide. First, we stopped in one of only four goddess temples in India, Viandhyanchal, in the village of Mirzapur. This “sleeping mountain” temple was intense. Wafting incense, bells ringing, drums pounding, people shouting and hitting stone walls amidst lots of pushing and shoving to see the female deity represented on the walls. Transcending the din, we planted ourselves on the ground amidst blackened marigolds, little kids poking our heads looking for money, and crowds knocking into us. Next, we went to the smaller Astabhugi Durga temple not far from Viandhyanchal. It’s worth a visit as well, but the actual space is only 4' tall so you won’t spend much time here. Fine with me, as I was ready to get to Kumbh Mela. We were fortunate enough to book rooms at the Maharishi Sadafaldeo Ashram, the closest accommodations to the Mela. The Ashram offers daily meditation and yoga classes, an evening spiritual session, and an Ayurvedic spa along with gracious grounds overlooking the Ganges. The Ashram erected some upscale tents just down the road, which was a very popular location within walking distance of the Mela. Not only were we closest to the Mela - but a short walk to the most auspicious bathing area, the Sangam.

Known as The Blue City for its many homes painted to denote them as Brahmin residences, Jodhpur is a chaotic hodgepodge of blue blocks at the foot of mighty Mehrangarh Fort. Interspersed with the sacred color associated with Lord Shiva, the city projects a galaxy of shades ranging from the jewel-toned saris of traditional Rajasthani women to muted tones of the 16th-century wall that protected Jodhpur in medieval times. Long before Mark Zuckerberg used blue for its soothing effect on Facebook users, Jodhpur’s citizens apparently knew of its psychological impact on a city.

Talk about first impressions: Carved sandstone elephants welcome guests into a two-story chandeliered lobby at this palace-style hotel. Attentive service starts at check-in, with gifts of bindis and fresh jasmine necklaces. At 550-square-feet or larger, rooms are palatial themselves, and richly decorated with oriental carpets, jacquards, and hand-embroidered brocades. Those on higher floors offer panoramic city views, but many visitors choose spaces overlooking the internal courtyard or expansive garden (and away from a 16-lane highway) for a sense of calm. The hotel’s Edwardian-inspired bar draws locals and guests alike with its 25-page whiskey and scotch menu, as does a rooftop pool with stunning vistas over New Delhi’s urban landscape. Unique amenities include an on-call astrologer and, for women travelers, the option of an all-female service staff, including butler, gym instructors, and private city guides.

In this week’s episode of Unpacked by AFAR, Erin Hynes—host of the podcast Curious Tourism—shares the ways that travel can help us navigate the difficult moments in life.