The Friendliest Place on Earth?
Malaysia: Home of world's tallest twin towers. And fifth-friendliest people?
I recently got a press release that trumpeted, “Malaysia Ranks 5th Amongst World’s Friendliest Countries.”
The first thing that struck me was how un-American it was to tout being fifth at anything. When was the last time you heard a crowd chanting, “We’re number five! We’re number five!” But ranking fifth among all the countries in the world is pretty good, I’d say. So, go Malaysia!
Then I wondered how “friendliness” was determined. As a traveler, that’s an issue that’s always puzzled me. I’m always suspicious when people come back from a trip raving, “and the people were so friendly.” It’s hard to say this without sounding grumpy, but it bugs me for a couple reasons. First, it’s a stereotype, even if it’s a positive one. You wouldn’t say, “and the people were so ugly.” I’m betting that anywhere you go, there are friendly people and unfriendly people. Second, in many cases, we travelers deal with people who are supposed to be friendly. They work at hotels or restaurants or drive cabs or lead hiking trips. It’s in their interest to be friendly. But I am willing to admit that people in certain countries do give off a warmer vibe than those in other countries. Hence my puzzlement.
Turns out the release was referring to the Expat Explorer Survey conducted by the bank HSBC, which asks expatriates to rate their adopted countries on a range of quality-of-life issues. It’s got some interesting stuff in there. For instance, most expats say their quality of life is better than it would be in their home country. And that while half of expats in Thailand say that they have they found love, only 4 percent of expats in India or Qatar have.
And it turns out things get complicated on the friendliness front. Malaysia actually ranks fourth (not fifth) in “Making Friends” but 14th in “Making Local Friends.” So it’s a good place for expats to make friends with each other–and it’s the best place in the world for finding a school for your expat kids, apparently–but not as good for making friends with Malaysians. Brazil and South Africa are tops on the local friend front.
If you had to rank the friendliest places you’ve been, who wins? Why?
Photo by Ramil Sagun.
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Sant’ Agata dei Goti, a small medieval town in Campania. Though my husband and speak next to zero Italian, and we never came across someone who spoke English, everyone we encountered bent over backward for us. Just a couple of examples: we stopped at an agriturismo to ask for a room and a wine tasting. The receptionist couldn’t understand us, but invited us up anyway, and called a cousin on the telephone to help translate. The whole process took at least half an hour, but the receptionist was never anything but good humored as the cousin giggled away and helped on the phone. (The room and wine were great too.) Then we went to a small restaurant down the street for dinner. Again, no English, but the owner and her daughter explained everything to us as best they could and could not have been more gracious. When we took a photograph of our bottle of wine, the daughter even led us downstairs to the family cellar and proudly showed us all their wine, their salamis, and all of their preserves. She was a little shy, but proud and happy to do it. To me, a lot of friendliness in travel comes from the willingness — and happiness — to reach across that divide.
bakinginstilettos
27 Jan 10 at 9:17 am
The people in Ireland are pretty friendly. They are always laughing and easy to talk to – must be the Guinness.
Joya
27 Jan 10 at 10:30 am
I totally agree with the point that most tourists interact with people whose job it is to be friendly. It really makes it difficult to gauge the authenticity of your interactions.
Having said that, Scotland’s people are supremely friendly. Most of my stays have been in peoples’ homes and they’ve treated me like one of the family.
Keith
27 Jan 10 at 12:29 pm
If you’re not good at making friends then you’ll struggle regardless of where you are.
Brazilians are very friendly, most of the Caribbean and the people in the Keys are pretty friendly too.
Trendy places and “being friendly” don’t typically go together, for ex. the bartender at a small pub in Chicago – friendly, the bartender at the new hot-spot in Miami – not friendly.
PS: this was the 5th best blog I’ve read today.
ElvisTravels
29 Jan 10 at 7:38 am
Catalans – most unfriendly people I’ve ever met.
This statement will be validated soon I hope.
nicholas
29 Jan 10 at 8:54 am
Ha! Thanks, ElvisTravels! We’re number 5! We’re number 5!
Jeremy Saum
29 Jan 10 at 8:57 am
Nicholas, I’m hoping to get to Barcelona later this year, where I’m hoping the Catalans will prove you wrong. Perhaps I’ll wait until after an FC Barcelona victory to approach anyone…
Jeremy Saum
29 Jan 10 at 8:59 am
What’s wrong with stereotypes? I wouldn’t come back from somewhere and say ” and the people were so ugly” but that’s because I know that if I did the person I was talking to would turn out to be somehow closely related to a bunch of people from there. But I have, at times, noticed the aesthetic appeal or otherwise of the locals (as a teenage girl in Fiji, I fell in lust with all the gorgeous young guys walking around about once an hour on average, including the times I was asleep and thus not able to fall in lust with anyone, in the USA as a just-out-of-teenager, I did not have a similar experience).
There are cultural differences between people, and one of the interesting parts of travel is figuring them out, which means not merely learning about the culture you are visiting, but also the culture you came from. But of course people vary from each other so much within a culture, that if you refused to deal in stereotypes, you’d never find out about any of those cultural differences. You might prefer to avoid stereotypes even at the price of learning less about the world and yourself, but I definitely don’t.
Secondly, while in many cases travellers are dealing with people who have a commerical interest in being friendly, that doesn’t mean that said people are friendly. I remember once leaving London after living there for a few months and wandering into a Starbucks, sleep deprived at 7 on a freezing cold morning, and wondering why the guy behind the counter was so friendly and cheerful and what drugs was his on! And then remembering that this is what normal people are like, and the Londoners are the oddity.
Tracy W
29 Jan 10 at 9:28 am
For meeting locals: Australia (Canberra) – but I was studying abroad & living in the dorms, so my view is definitely skewed.
Japanese are friendly-ish, particularly in smaller towns where strangers will say hello…but only because you’re a foreigner they can practice on. I also experienced a lot of friendly praise for my Japanese ability, but since all I said was “Good morning,” I think the bar is just really low.
I also lived in France, and I just want to help dispel the “French are rude” stereotype. It’s all a matter of politeness. You don’t stick your chopsticks sticking out of your rice in Japan, and you don’t act like everyone should speak English in France (really I don’t think you should do this in any country). Just say (in French) “I’m sorry. I don’t speak French, do you speak English?” and you’re golden.
I just moved to Boston from Southern California, and I’m finding the residents WAY more friendly here. (and yes, I’m freezing)
Lisa
30 Jan 10 at 8:49 pm
We (hubby and I) spent nearly a month in a sleepy fishing village in Mexico on the Yucatan Peninsula. My friends from the sates seemed so cynical saying that Mexicans are only friendly because they want you to buy something. I guess that does exist, but we came home with long lasting friendships. The people we met were so open and went out of their way to be helpful and then met us for dinner, exchanged email addresses and facebook friend requests. I love my friends from Mexico and I have a feeling other Latin American countries will offer much the same experience. I can’t wait to travel to ALL of them!
Laura
1 Feb 10 at 5:39 pm
If you had to rank the friendliest places you’ve been, who wins? Why? http://bit.ly/9qZX1A
This comment was originally posted on Twitter
AfarMedia
2 Feb 10 at 9:03 am
Anghiari, Tuscany, bc no1’s hungry!RT @AfarMedia: If you had to rank the friendliest places you’ve been, who wins? Why? http://bit.ly/9qZX1A
This comment was originally posted on Twitter
dlcuratolo
2 Feb 10 at 12:07 pm
I agree that Malaysia is – in general – very friendly. I have lived there and also visited many tourist spots there. It’s a great place to stay and to travel in. (And the food is marvelous!)
The friendliest country I have visited is Cambodia. It’s so stunning to think about the years of terror under the Khmer Rouge when you meet and talk with so many genuinely nice people. Kids are very nice and yell hello to visitors. Adults smile and try to have a conversation even when you and they don’t share a common language. I traveled to about six or eight towns and cities in Cambodia and felt relaxed and safe everywhere I went.
Mindy McAdams
2 Feb 10 at 12:59 pm
Tunisia. Visited Tunis, Sidi Bou Said, Carthage, La Marsa and the coast, and took a day trip down to Dougga. Never, ever met anyone who wasn’t kind and helpful. The people were a big part of making Tunisia the best place I’ve ever visited.
Chris
3 Feb 10 at 7:34 am
I spent five days getting lost in Istanbul and found the locals friendly and full of smiles. Slovenians are high on my list as well.
Francoism
13 Feb 10 at 9:51 am
To be honest, everywhere I travel I meet wonderful people and on occasion I meet a person who is probably just having a bad day. But if I had to generalize, the best experience I have ever had with the people being unbelievably welcoming I would say that it was in Vietnam. I was in Saigon and Hanoi for business a couple of years ago and was just blown away by how warm and friendly everyone was to me. They made the trip unforgettable and Vietnam is high on my list of places to return when I have a month or two to explore because it deserves that much time and attention.
Neeley Main
30 Mar 10 at 11:19 am